Captain Oblivious was the world’s most unusual superhero. His powers included ignoring obvious problems, misreading every situation, and using phrases like “Well, that’s someone else’s issue!” whenever trouble arose. Though he had a cape, he was better known for his invisibility to real issues.
One day, a villain known as Dr. Not-So-Bad devised a plan to cover the entire city in mildly inconvenient obstacles: sticky doorknobs, untied shoelaces, and absurdly difficult parking spaces. Captain Oblivious was alerted, but instead of stopping the chaos, he took it as an opportunity to “raise awareness” about the “importance of caution.” His speech was met with utter confusion, as the crowd only wanted him to stop Dr. Not-So-Bad.
After a day of complicating simple solutions, the citizens took matters into their own hands. They fixed the doorknobs, tied the shoelaces, and moved their cars, all without Captain Oblivious. He later thanked himself for his “guiding influence” and rode off into the sunset, blissfully unaware of his irrelevance.
Moral:
Sometimes, the most heroic thing is recognizing when to get out of the way.
